Put Us On Your List, Bill!

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

We Hate Bill O'Reilly And Want To Be On His List

We the undersigned do solemnly swear that we are engaged in what television "personality" Bill O'Reilly (R-Fox News) describes as the distribution of "information supplied by far left websites."*

We the undersigned also solemnly swear that we think O'Reilly (R-Falafel) is a fatuous gasbag who spends more time looking in the mirror and crooning "Who's the fairest of them all? You! That's right, you, you sexy beast!" than he does researching anything he says on his alleged talk show.

We also solemnly swear that, like MSNBC, the St. Petersburg Times, and the New York Daily News, we belong on Bill O'Reilly's enemies list.

Therefore, we the undersigned ask O'Reilly (R-Really Bad Porn Novel) to add us to his list.

Instructions: To be added, simply comment to this post. Each of us shall provide, in comments, the name we wish displayed on O'Reilly's list, along with reasons we should appear on said list.

Happy Holidays!

*Bill calls such information "defamatory" and "false," but he's full of shit. Also, he's ugly.

posted by Tony at 7:45 AM

52 Comments:

  • Bill you fucking asshole. I really AM your enemy. If I ever see you in public I will violently attack you and smash your face. Put me on your list, bitch.

    By Blogger Brendan, at 8:41 AM  

  • Dear Mr. O'Reilly, we wish to be considered as an entrant on your enemies list.

    We feel we meet the criteria with which we would be considered by you as "an enemy."

    * we have expressed our desire that our modern heroes, our troops, be used only in dire need and as a last resort and not for capricious imperial campaigns that have been ill conceived and do not leave our nation safer.

    * we have expressed our desire that our elected officials not accept bribes from contractors.

    * we have expressed our desire for our elected officials put America first and not their party first, whatever their party be.

    * we have expressed the belief that our elected officials should represent the American people and not corporate interests that ill serve America.

    * we have expressed the believe that if an intelligence official has put her life on the line to inquire about weapons of mass destruction that could be used against our citizens the executive branch should not jeopardize her safety and leak her identity.

    * we believe the safety of Americans should be put ahead of corporate interests and that its ports and chemical and nuclear plants should be secured.

    * we believe America means something. We believe America was a liberal concept by our founding fathers that a nation could be a moral entity reflecting the will of its people and working to promote its general welfare.

    * we believe America is good. That means we believe torture and lying is something our government should not do.

    * we believe politics should be a competition of ideas. Reasoned discussions of all sides lead the voter to make the informed and correct decision. Sometimes that means a republican wins, sometimes that means a democrat wins, and sometimes that means an independent or third party official wins. But when America decides on a representative with the understanding of that person’s true policies and history we all win.

    As you will no doubt agree these beliefs and statements would makes us what you consider an enemy and that we should be added to your list.

    Though we often refer to our site as This Century Sucks or even TCS we believe that full disclosure is the best policy so you should use our full name when listing us.

    This Century Sucks - A Fair and Balanced Look at the Continuing Corrupt
    and Evil Whistle Ass Administration

    We do note that we use long-winded commentary and often have a holier than thou tone - so we do have some things in common.

    Thank you for your consideration Mr. O'Reilly and Happy Holidays.

    By Blogger rob, at 8:50 AM  

  • Sorry that was so long, I don't know what came over my. Typing diarrhea.

    By Blogger rob, at 8:59 AM  

  • This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    By Blogger filkertom, at 10:25 AM  

  • Cap'n Falafel, sir, I consider you to be a whining reality-challenged bullying misogynistic treasonous lying asshat buffoon. You have no respect or regard for anyone or anything besides your own inflated ego, and you think you're hot stuff just because you're loud and tall. You pass yourself off as being one of the Common Folks, without the slightest hint of what their lives are actually like -- and you try to come up with quips and catch-phrases (I can only presume because of some morbid jealousy of Tucker Carlson, which ought to be looked at), but you aren't even Oscar the Grouch, let along Oscar Wilde. The only debate you could win would be a mass-debate (don't think about it too har- er, for too lon- oh, forget it), and even that would be lonely and miserable, which I'm pretty sure sums up your life anyway. So, sign me up, psycho. Oh, and, Happy Holidays.

    By Blogger filkertom, at 10:35 AM  

  • NTodd, Christian Soldier, humbly DEMANDS listing. And this is why, beyotch!

    By Blogger ntodd, at 10:46 AM  

  • O'Reilly, I hate your fucking sanctimonious non-pithy bloviating. You, Mr. Falafel, are a rude and self-absorbed prick.

    You are a fucking asshole, and you don't deserve your audience. So this is my message to you:

    SHUT UP!!! SHUT UP!! SHUT UP!!!

    By Blogger Vicki, at 10:53 AM  

  • Loofah.

    And you'd probably not like my blog, either.

    Loofah.

    By Blogger Mumon K, at 11:11 AM  

  • Put me on the list you no talent ass-clown, especially after you fouled my morning by being on the Toady Show. I don't watch Faux News for a reason and now you're spoiling my free tv, eat it you, Jackass.

    By Blogger Matt, at 11:27 AM  

  • I've already told Mr. Loofah that I should be on the list, but I'll say it again: Bill, I think you suck, and I should be on your enemies list.

    And if I may quote literature's greatest philosopher: "If I could work my will, every idiot who goes about with 'Merry Christmas' on his lips, should be boiled in his own pudding and buried with a stake of holly through his heart. He should!"

    By Blogger Scott, at 11:32 AM  

  • Dear Bill, please don't forget me. Yes, of course I drink deeply from those far-left watering holes, and have for a very long time. My daddy always told me to read more than one paper, and I really have learned a great deal from them. These sources you call far-left have been telling me the truth, even as your president, your network and -- gee -- even you have not.
    Scott Ridder, Greg Rangwala -- you wouldn't listen to them. No, you sucked down an outdated, cribbed grad student's thesis on WMD. You bought the cherry-picked lies wholesale. Most of all, you never admit fault.
    It's sad. I sense how much you need people to like you, but how can I, when so many are dead because of the lies that you embraced with every fiber of your being?
    So please -- put me on your list. Deborah Mattingly Conner

    By Blogger deborah, at 12:51 PM  

  • Please, please please add me to your list, you fatuous gasbag.

    By Blogger Jim, at 1:48 PM  

  • Please add me, you fatuous gasbag.

    By Blogger Jim, at 1:48 PM  

  • Dear Bill,

    Please oh please add me to your enemies list. It would make my holiday this year to see my name on your site.

    Signed,
    Miss Fuzzy Bunny

    P.S. Please forgive me for NOT including my phone number in my request, Bill.

    By Blogger Fuzzy, at 2:10 PM  

  • Oh, sign me up for that list! And, Happy F@$%#ing Holidays to you, Billy Boy!

    By Blogger FastMovingCloud, at 4:49 PM  

  • Steve J.
    http://radamisto.blogspot.com

    Please, Bill, I'm begging you - put me on your list!

    By Blogger Steve J., at 5:27 PM  

  • I would be honored to be on the list. O'Reilly is a self-serving, cynical, corrupt, egotistical jackass. America would be a richer, healthier country without his foul stench lingering around.

    By Blogger Observer, at 6:01 PM  

  • I demand to be on Bill's list. I once compared him to Father Coughlin. Obviously I need to be sent to liberal internment camp for that.

    By Blogger The Kenosha Kid, at 6:19 PM  

  • pansypoo would LOVE to be so honored!

    By Blogger pansypoo, at 6:49 PM  

  • Frankly, I'd have to say it's clear that Bill jumping on the War Against Christmas bandwagon is as clear a case of cynical pandering to a rabid demographic as any I've ever seen. Get me on that list, Biznitch!

    By Blogger mergenow, at 6:53 PM  

  • Bill, I'm a secular humanist.

    I'd carry a card, but no-one ever told me where to get one.

    You're a paranoid gasbag, get a life.

    and merry holidays.

    By Blogger mdhatter, at 7:03 PM  

  • Bill-

    All I want for Christmas is to be put on your list.

    I hope you are taking your meds Bill because I really think you are about to lose it. Ever since you told Al Franken to SHUT UP at the LA Book fair I think you are slowly going mad- I don't mean angry- I mean bat shit mad.

    Ever since that day I have been predicting that a fall from grace was in your future. I thought that your old employee Andrea was going to get you- but luckily for you for some unGOd reason you have become rich as hell. I still think somewhere out there someone knows something that will bring you DOWN..........

    By Blogger Lauren, at 7:40 PM  

  • bill, you are a complete asshat, undeserving of capital letters, even. you're too much off a cry baby booby to put me on your list.
    and don't forget, bill's a terrorist sympathizer

    By Blogger shayera, at 8:57 PM  

  • Is this the line for the 'Whack a Mole' game?

    That's David Aquarius, Bill. Spell it right then it goes on the Left.

    By Blogger David Aquarius, at 12:58 AM  

  • Don't shove the vibrator so far up your ass, I think you might have caused yourself some brain damage.

    By Blogger merlallen, at 2:18 AM  

  • Bill, you are loathed by us Euro-weenies as well. Put all of us on the list too.

    By Blogger Republic of Palau, at 3:00 AM  

  • bill, you stupid cowardly prick,

    Fuck You. Happy Holidays. Now put me on your list.

    I assure you, I am your enemy. I look forward to meeting you in person one day and proving it.

    By Blogger TJ, at 5:48 AM  

  • I would like to be on O'Falafel's list

    after all no such thing as bad publicity!

    O'Reilly is a complete and utter wanker.

    By Blogger Moonbootica, at 5:52 AM  

  • I consider myself a prime contender for Bill's List. Why? Because I think he's an insufferable, hypocritical, sexist, despicable douchebag of a human being whose only concerns are stroking his own felafel and getting ratings.

    Hey, Bill: Go fuck yourself.

    Love,

    watertiger.

    By Blogger watertiger, at 7:25 AM  

  • Because he is psychotic, pompous, an asshole, and thinks that people who disagree with him and the GOP deserve to get blown up by terrorists.

    And because I am a liberal pinko bleeding-heart moonbat, and FUCKING PROUD OF IT.

    Cordially Up Yours,O"Reilly,

    Emma

    By Blogger Emma, at 8:27 AM  

  • I should be on Bill's list:
    Yet Another Web Site

    By Blogger foistboinder, at 8:28 AM  

  • My hand is not invisible, and with it, I give O'Reilly the finger.

    By Blogger rorschach, at 8:30 AM  

  • I have been doing all I can to get on that list.

    http://risinghegemonxxx.blogspot.com/2005/11/bill-oreilly-is-large_20.html

    By Blogger Attaturk, at 9:40 AM  

  • Bill, you cretinous torrent of clumpy offal, put me on your list, you blotchy loofah-lovin falafellinator, you.

    P.S. Your mama dresses you funny.

    By Blogger Grumpy, at 12:19 PM  

  • Bill, I burned your book when my mother gave me a copy last Christmas.

    Add me to your list, you lying, fatuous whacko.

    By Blogger Motherlode, at 4:12 PM  

  • Of course I should be on the list.

    'Nuff said.


    .

    By Blogger spork_incident, at 4:24 PM  

  • Fuck U O'Luffa

    By Blogger PerceptionManagers.Org, at 4:25 PM  

  • Hey...Count me in. I love to be on lists. I'm a list kind of guy. What say you on the list?

    By Blogger swampdawg, at 6:08 PM  

  • Bill, you falafel-molesting gas-bag, put me on your list.

    By Blogger TheCrapture, at 11:22 AM  

  • I demand satisfaction. O'Reilly, put me on your damned list.


    You whiny assed punk.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 11:47 AM  

  • Proud to be an enemy of the state of Bill.
    List me, billy boy. I hate you and all you stand behind, cowering, like the rat fucked hampster you are.

    By Blogger PWhit, at 12:57 PM  

  • Please add me to this list: fuck Bill O'Liely

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at 2:32 PM  

  • *politely raises hand*

    Me, please?

    Since I consider you a lying, cheating, hypocrite.

    In case you're wondering.

    By Blogger Dr Molly Black: The Philosophical Epicurian, at 2:55 PM  

  • Dear Bill, Just remember Jesus will forgive you, that's his job not our's. At least you don't have to worry about whether you soul will go to heaven or hell. It long ago withered and died and blew away on the night wind.

    By Blogger montag, at 3:06 PM  

  • Dear Bill,

    I'm a feminazi, and I guess I must be a lezzie since I was in the military and we all know women only join the military to get husbands or because they're lezzies.

    Oh, and I'm one of them pagans.

    Mememememememe!!!!!

    By Blogger Unknown, at 11:11 AM  

  • fux faux newz
    fux fatuous o'really

    "we have a list here..."
    more prophetic words were never heard

    By Blogger jesselmabus, at 11:36 AM  

  • Dear Billy,

    For Hogswatch I want a pony, a fire truck, and for your head to blow up.

    PS I asked the Magic Sky Man you like so much if he was grateful for all the work you've put in making sure that people spend money on the Baby Jeezus and he said "Billy Who? Oh, Fox, I don't pay any attention to that crap."

    Sincerely,

    Hating You in San Francisco

    By Blogger Tater, at 5:07 PM  

  • Jesus said, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

    Before greeting someone with words recognizing a day of religious observence, I ought to, considering Jesus' teaching, think about how I would feel if I were in that person's place.

    I ought to consider that that person may follow a different religion, or may not be a religious person at all.

    And if that person follows a different religion or follows no religion, I ought to consider that my words recognizing one particular day of religious observence might cause that person to be uncomfortable.

    I do not like to be made uncomfortable, so, by Jesus' teachings, I should not do that which makes another person uncomfortable.

    By Jesus' teaching, then, I should not greet a person with words recognizing Jesus' celebrated day of birth.

    And ya know what? I think He'd be OK with that!

    For this argument, and for the fact that I think that O'Reilly is a demagogic huckster, I want on the list.

    Lame Man

    By Blogger albany layman, at 12:56 PM  

  • Oh Please, Oh Please add me to your list Billy!

    I find you most false amongst false prophets, St. Oy'Rielly, and I MUST admit that I've been faithful to my google bombing of you as a Terrorist Sympathizer, helping to plant you square at the top of the Google listings.

    Although I find your advocacy of prostate stimulation via anal vibratory penetration as a means toward male sexual health repugnant, I don't hold it against you-- woah be it for me to deny a man his fetish... Even John Lennon admitted that every man has one... Who am I to argue?

    I admit that your recommendations of the use of Lufah and/or Felafel as a sexual/masturbatory aid have resulted in nasty callouses on my Little Man, in the case of the former, and a horrible rash in the case of the latter, so you should find yourself lucky that I don't press recompense of my medical bills upon you. For those matters alone, you should add me to your list... or, perhaps as a show of commiseration, as I know you KNOW the levels of my suffering, if nothing else.

    That being said, I find your attitude toward woman in particular, and toward those who share differing political and social views from yours as absolutely repugnant, and anathema to a healthy Democracy and United States.

    I pray that someday, you will find yourself in the hands of the Karmic Fates, who will assuredly teach you a multitude of lessons required for a healthy and successful life... In the meantime, I wish you all the penile callouses, rashes, rectal bleeding, pox and sexual assault your current way of life entitles you. You've earned it, buddy.

    PLEASE consider making me a part of your Top 100, as I bet ownership of my prize Yule Tree to a Danish Lesbian friend of mine, who promises to list her membership Username as "BillsLezStrapOnLover," versus a year's Premium Membership in your site, that you would that you'll accept me. My Yule Tree or "BillsLezStrapOnLover," PAID Premium Membership... Your choice Bill... I HOPE you'll accept me. my Al Franken(tm) Magic 8-Ball says you will...

    Happy Holidays, Billy!

    A Liberal dose of hugs and kisses to you, but a conservative amount of shower rape...


    MONKEYFISTER
    http://blah3.com

    By Blogger --mf, at 7:46 PM  

  • Bush = Hitler.
    O'Reilly = Goebells.

    Is that good enough for you, Bill?

    ThomasMc.com

    By Blogger Thomas Mc., at 9:50 AM  

  • Mr. O'Reilly,

    As to your "war on Christmas" rhetoric, your "christian party" is attacking Jews, gays, and immigrants.

    this isn't just some funny thing the right are going on about. This is part of a continuing effort to extend the role of heterosexual white Christians as the model and center of our society. And that has a scary history whether you're talking about Nazis, McCarthyism, or the Klan.

    Put me on your enemies list, you fascist.

    Mike

    http://bornatthecrestoftheempire.blogspot.com/

    By Blogger mikevotes, at 6:04 AM  

  • Not even a hundred comments against Bill O'Reilly? Well, thats just pathetic. Where's the blind hate liberals are known for? Where's the fire? The incoherance and vulgarity? Oh wait, I see the last two parts. Just not in the quantity you'd expect.

    I get the feeling a lot of professed liberals are actually closet Bill O'Reilley fans, faithfully watching the factor, buying the books.

    Heh, glad to have you on board

    By Blogger Spacemonkey, at 7:08 AM  

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